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BIBLE RIDDLES

Q.  Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?

A.  Noah; he was floating his stock while everyone was in

    liquidation.

Q.  Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?

A.  Pharaoh's daughter; she went down to the bank of the

    Nile and drew out a little prophet.

Q.  What kind of man was Boaz before he got married?

A.  Ruth-less.

Q.  Who was the first drug addict in the Bible?

A.  Nebuchadnezzar; he was on grass for seven years.

Q.  What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?

A.  Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury.

A.  David's Triumph was heard throughout the land.

A.  Honda... because the apostles were all in one Accord.

A.  2 Cor. 4:8 describes going out in service in a

    Volkswagen, "We are pressed in every way, but not

    cramped beyond movement."

Q.  Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?

A.  Samson; he brought the house down.

Q.  Where is the first baseball game in the Bible?

A.  In the Big Inning, Eve stole first, Adam stole second,

    Cain struck out Abel, and the Prodigal Son came home.

    The Giants and the Angels were rained out.

Q.  How did Adam and Eve feel when expelled from the Garden

    of Eden?

A.  They were really put out.

Q.  What is one of the first thing that Adam and Eve did

    after they were kicked out?

A.  They really raised Cain.

Q.  What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he

    no longer lived in Eden?

A.  Your mother ate us out of house and home

Q.  How long did Cain hate his brother?

A.  As long as he was Abel!

Q.  What was the last thing Noah said before he entered the

    Ark?

A.  So long Fellers!

Q.  The ark was built in 3 stories and the top story had a

    window to  let light in, but how did they get light to

    the bottom 2 stories?

A.  They used floodlights.

Q.  After the flood, how many people left the ark ahead of

    Noah?

A.  3 because the Bible says that Noah went forth out of

    the ark

Q.  Where is the first mention of insurance in the Bible?

A.  When Adam and Eve needed more coverage.

Q.  Where is another mention of insurance in the Bible?

A.  When David gave Goliath a piece of the rock.

Q.  Who is the greatest babysitter mentioned in the Bible?

A.  David, he rocked Goliath to sleep.

Q.  Why was Goliath so surprised when David hit him with a

    slingshot?

A.  The thought had never entered his head before?

Q.  If Goliath is resurrected, would you like to tell him

     the joke about David and Goliath?

A.  No, he already fell for it once.

Q.  Why did Paul tell Timothy to take just a little wine

     for the sake of his stomach?

A.  Because it was Paul's bottle.

Q.  What is the best way to get to Paradise?

A.  Turn right and go straight.

Q.  Why won't we drink milk in the new world?

A.  Because, at Armageddon, there will be udder destruction.

Q.  Why shouldn't Christians watch TV?

A.  At the transfiguration, Jesus said, "Tell the vision to

     no one."

Q.  Who was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?

A.  Moses, because he broke all 10 commandments at once.

Q.  Who was known as a Mathematician in the Bible?

A.  Moses, he wrote the book of Numbers.

Q.  Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?

A.  The area around the Jordan, the banks were always

    overflowing.

Q.  How do we know that Job went to a chiropractor?

A.  Because Job16:12, 14, 16 says, "I had come to be at

    ease, but he proceeded to shake me up: and he grabbed me

    by the back of the neck and proceeded to smash me."

Q.  Will there be dogs in the new system?

A.  No, 2 Peter 3:14 tells us that we will be without spot.

Q.  Who was the straightest man in the bible?

A.  Joseph, because the Pharaoh made him a ruler.

Q.  Which Christian magazine did the apostle Paul command

    to never throw away?

A.  Ephesians 5:18 says to "keep Awake"

 DO PEOPLE BECOME ANGELS AFTER DEATH?

No, angels are not glorified human beings. Matthew 22:30 explains that they do not marry or reproduce like humans, and Hebrews 12:22-23 says that when we get to the heavenly Jerusalem, we will be met by "myriads of angels" and "the spirits of righteous men made perfect" - two separate groups.

Angels are a company or association, not a race descended from a common ancestor (Luke 20:34-36). We are called "sons of men," but angels are never called "sons of angels."

WHO OR WHAT ARE ANGELS?

The word "angel" actually comes from the Greek word aggelos, which means "messenger." The matching Hebrew word mal'ak has the same meaning.

Sometimes, the Bible uses these words for human beings:

· Ordinary people who carry messages (Job 1:14; Luke 7:24; 9:52)

· Prophets (Isaiah 42:19; Malachi 3:1)

· priests (Malachi 2:7)

· church leaders (Rev 1:20)

Sometimes, it speaks figuratively of things or events as "messengers"...

· the pillar of cloud (Exodus 14:19)

· pestilence or plagues (2 Samuel 24:16-17)

But it usually describes the whole range of spirits whom God has created, including both good and evil angels, and special categories such as cherubim, seraphim, and the archangel.

HOW DID ANGELS ORIGINATE?

The Scripture speaks about the creation of angels, therefore, it is clear that they have not existed from all eternity (Nehemiah 9:6; Psalm 148:2,5). Colossians 1:16-17 explains:

The time of their creation is never definitely specified, but it is most probable that it occurred in connection with the creation of the heavens in Genesis 1:1. It may be that God created the angels immediately after He had created the heavens and before He created the earth - for according to Job 38:4-7, "the sons of God shouted for joy" when He laid the foundations of the earth.

HOW MANY ANGELS ARE THERE?

While the Scriptures give no definite figures, we are told that the number of angels is very great (Daniel 7:10; Matthew 26:53; Hebrews 12:22).

DO ANGELS HAVE BODIES?

Angels are essentially "ministering spirits," (Hebrews 1:14) and do not have physical bodies like humans. Jesus declared that "a spirit hath not flesh and bones, as ye see me have" (Luke 24:37-39).

Angels can take on the appearance of men when the occasion demands. How else could some "entertain angels unaware" (Hebrews 13:2)? On the other hand, their appearance is sometimes in dazzling white and blazing glory (Matthew 28:2-4).

WHAT DO ANGELS LOOK LIKE?

Since angels are spirits rather than physical beings, they don't have to be visible at all (Colossians 1:16). Elisha once prayed that his servant would see the armies of angels surrounding the city, and the young man discovered that he had overlooked a lot of invisible beings (2 Kings 6:17)! When angels do appear, they generally appear in the form of men. In Genesis 18, Abraham welcomed three angelic guests who appeared at first to be nothing more than some travelers. In the following chapter, two angels went to Sodom where they were assumed to be simply a pair of human visitors.

With the possible exception of one debatable passage in Zechariah 5:9, angels always appear as males rather than females (Mark 16:5).

Sometimes an angel appears to be a man with unusual features. Daniel saw an angel with arms and legs resembling polished metal and precious stones, and a face like lightning (Daniel 10:5-6). The angel that rolled back the stone from Christ's tomb was radiating dazzling light (Matthew 28:3; Luke 24:4). The book of Revelation describes some highly unusual beings who may be a variety of angel in Revelation 4:6-8.

Angels in the Bible never appear as cute, chubby infants! They are always full-grown adults. When people in the Bible saw an angel, their typical response was to fall on their faces in fear and awe, not to reach out and tickle an adorable baby. Some Bible passages picture angels with wings (Isaiah 6:2,6). Other verses talk about angels flying, and we assume that the wings would be useful for that flight (Daniel 9:21). However, I suspect that angels can move around without having to depend on wings. Most references to angels in the Bible say nothing about wings, and in passages like Genesis 18-19, it is certain that no wings were visible.

With the exception of the Lord's Prayer or Apart from the Lord's prayer which is the Basic prayer, these steps